First things first, what is confidence?
ĢżConfidence is a mindset. Itās about looking at every situation as an opportunity to learn and improve. Itās about knowing that youāve āgot this,ā but not feeling downhearted or discouraged if you donāt.
Dr Samuels says confidence is necessary for growth. āIf you feel confident, youāll be able to overcome setbacks and learn from your mistakes. You may receive negative feedback, but youāll see it as an opportunity to get better,ā she says.
Confidence is directly linked to academic performance, so itās important to make sure your child is full of it ā in a good way. Hereās how:
Model confidence
Kids pick up a confident mindset from their parents, so itās important to bite your negative-Nancy tongue and be a good role model. Dr Samuels says itās time to stop with the negative self-talk. āParents saying āI canāt do somethingā or āIām not good at somethingā in front of their children can be very damaging. They have to be aware of the impact that modelling will have on their children,ā she says. Simply put, if you want your child to be confident, be confident.
Encourage risk taking
When we think about risk, itās easy to jump to a negative place. Weāre not saying your child should bring back the planking trend, weāre talking about the healthy kind of risks that help them grow. āEncouraging your kids to be adventurous and give things a go is the only way theyāll build new skills,ā Dr Samuels says. As well as instilling confidence, risk-taking helps kids develop independent thinking, motor skills and perception and helps parents identify areas where their child may need extra guidance or support.
Donāt solve their problems
Itās in our nature to want to protect our children from failure, but intervening wonāt do them any favours in the confidence department. Dr Samuels says kids need to understand that failure ā and the emotions that come with it ā are normal. āItās ok to help them through the process of problem solving, rather than coming in as the knight in shining armour and solving it for them,ā she says. Theyāll probably struggle, maybe even fail, but theyāll always learn. Ģż
Get outside learning support
There is a real value in adults ā beyond parents and teachers ā providing kids with the encouragement and support they need to grow. Dr Samuels says that when it comes to learning, itās the partnership and allegiance that kids have with their tutor that really builds their confidence. āWe know that children are often too nervous to put their hand up in class to admit they donāt know something in front of their peers,ā she says. Itās important to find a safe space where kids feel comfortable to ask questions or admit they donāt know something without being judged.